While travelling in the car with Liam, Edith and her kids last week i noticed something: my son often whines about his problems. These are kids problems but as he whines, they tend to become mine, to irritate me.
Dad, i am hungry!
Dad, i am bored!
Dad, i am too hot!
Dad, i need to pee!
Dad, Dad, Dad!!!
Sounds familiar? I am certain i am not alone.
So here was my thought process: Martin, this is your son, your problem, your responsibility. You raised him. If you feel irritated, don’t whine, find a solution! Suddenly, i understood.
– Liam?
– What?
– You are old enough now. From now on, when you have a problem, i want you to think before you ask Me. I want you to stop telling me what is your problem and start telling me what is your solution. Ok?
– Ok.
…
– Dad?
– Yes?
– Can i move this pillow, i am hot.
– Yes.
This simple shift in perspective changes everything. Through small things, one step at a time, i will change my son from whiner to problem solver.
Original post Facebook, August 2017
Martin Pham Dinh 