Tonight i scheduled a moment with myself.
After i put Liam to sleep, i took a bath.
I put on comfortable clothes
I started a fire
I lit a few candles
I put few drops of essential oil in the diffuser
The atmosphere was set for a moment with myself.
I sat, in silence, with my dog, watching the fire
I did nothing but live and breathe and think.
It was not a meditation, it was just listening to the silence,
It was just being with myself and doing nothing.
I thought about the pace of our lives
I thought about time
It always comes back to my mind this idea that our time is precious and how it must be well spent, not wasted.
In this moment of silence, there is more space for an awareness of time as it slows down
I can see it in the light of the fire
It starts slowly
It grows
It becomes strong and warm
And then, imperceptibly, it weakens and it starts to die, slowly.
In this serene moment, i understand that this is life.
The significance of my life has nothing to do with what i achieve as a person and how much money or precious jewels i accumulate.
I am just a man, a little speck of life in the universe.
The significance of my life has everything to do with how i use this time i am given to be and to really live.
For me, real happiness is found in love, family and friendship. There is nothing else more important so i will change the focus of my life to spend as much time as i can with my loved ones, my family and my friends.
After an hour and a half with my thoughts and myself, i broke the silence with this beautiful music from Yo Yo ma and i started to write.
Writing is how i explore and clarify feelings and experience.
As i am writing these lines, the fire is dying down, my dog is just breathing slowly beside me and i am having this last thought before i go to sleep.
I fear nothing, neither life nor death and certainly not what happen in between them.
Just live, breathe and enjoy this precious time life had given you.
Thank you.
Martin Pham Dinh 