I am trying to develop the skill of responding thoughtfully rather than reacting emotionally to events in my life. I understand that emotions often arise in reaction to my interpretation of events (narrative) rather than the event itself. Frequently and to varying intensity, emotions prevent us from seeing reality as it is, especially when theyContinue reading “On being the architect of your personal experience…”
Author Archives: martinphamdinh
On meaningful relationships…
In love, do not search endlessly for the perfect partner.Neither of you will be. When you connect with someone,Put all your energy into building a resonant relationship. Love is not about who we are,Love is about how we care for each other. Thank you.
On cultivating emotional balance …
Have you ever been so angry that you yelled at your kid? Have you ever been so frustrated that you wanted to break something? I must admit I have. These unfortunate reactions emerge when our emotions overwhelm our rational brain. We become “hijacked” by our lower brain functions. It feels like becoming a gorilla forContinue reading “On cultivating emotional balance …”
The three types of intelligence…
Rational intelligence or logic is widely known and helps us explain, predict phenomena in our world and solve problems. It can be cultivated, this is the goal of classic education.If you have ever been unable to solve a problem, then you understand the value of rational intelligence. Emotional intelligence is about recognizing, being aware andContinue reading “The three types of intelligence…”
Save 1000$ in psychotherapy…
Listen to Esther Perel and Peter Attia talk about personal trauma, narrative, sex, parenting and child development. It is so good I could not stop listening. It is so dense in knowledge and wisdom that i am taking notes.
What emotional intelligence means to me…
When emotional intelligence emerges, it feels like removing a blindfold and seeing reality in an infinite nuances of colors. When I am self-centred, it feels like my vision is restricted to black and white. When I am self-centred, life is a struggle, me versus the world, and reality is seen as a series of checksContinue reading “What emotional intelligence means to me…”
Gift of life…
Plasma is free to give and can have a significant impact on someone else’s health. This is how I start my Saturday morning
On what friendship means to me…
Me and Daniel, we became friends about 32 years ago, in our early high school years at the College Saint-Alexandre. Back then, we used to get together and we went to lift weights at the Sportheque. Often, we would end the evening eating Harvey’s hamburgers at his home, talking about what life could be, hopingContinue reading “On what friendship means to me…”
17 years of emergency medicine…
After discussing this morning with a colleague, I feel the need to share this text that was published in December 2017 because it is still relevant. It was originally written in French and translated using Deepl so there might be a few mistakes.. “To all my colleagues, I’ve been working in the emergency room forContinue reading “17 years of emergency medicine…”
Une chanson sur la joie d’être parent… A song about the joy of parenting…
Mr Capeo, merci de comprendre ce sentiment et de l’écrire avec tant d’éloquence. Mr Capeo, thank you for understanding this feeling and writing it so eloquently. Paroles ci-bas. Lyrics below. Il y aura les jours avec, les jours sansLes amis qui retourneront leurs vestes en un rien de tempsLes jours de peine qui nous enchaînentContinue reading “Une chanson sur la joie d’être parent… A song about the joy of parenting…”
The ebike, a tool for sustainable flow states
« Flow is the mental state in which a person performing some activity is fully immersed in a feeling of energized focus, full involvement, and enjoyment in the process of the activity » – Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi I have experienced flow many times, in my work and in a few sports in which I have a good enoughContinue reading “The ebike, a tool for sustainable flow states”
On self-care in healthcare…
Self-care is not selfish. Let me explain why. Self-care is a means to ensure that one gives from a place of abundance so that our work is sustainable long-term. When our physical, cognitive, emotive and social batteries are full, giving our time feels right, and we resonate positively with the work we do, making ourContinue reading “On self-care in healthcare…”
How we grow children well…
Summer vacation and family trips are a special time in childhood and parenthood.In the last 4 days, I have spent every minute with my son either doing something, driving somewhere or sharing a single room. In these moments, I observed him from a distance and appreciated how he has grown.Whereas last year, he did hisContinue reading “How we grow children well…”
Where passion is born…
At the intersection of competence and challenge, where a sense of mastery slowly emerges, my son found flow, and he felt this deep pleasure that comes with the feeling of control as one descends a mountain on two wheels. He asked for more, but we already had spent 3 hours on our bikes on theContinue reading “Where passion is born…”
The quiet life…
For a long time, I participated in the fast paced rat race that modern life creates. I worked hard, played hard and I kept a never ending to-do-list supplemented by an infinite bucket list. I never burned out but i often felt out of breath. When I quit emergency medicine in 2018, i thought that thisContinue reading “The quiet life…”
Jillian Horton’s We are perfectly fine… a short review
Horton offers an inside look at the life of a Canadian doctor, filled with the struggles, the doubts, the occasional guilt… I appreciate her dark humour. In the end, she is a lot of what medicine lacks: open honesty. We, doctors, are good at treating diseases, alleviating suffering, listening and holding hands… but, sadly, weContinue reading “Jillian Horton’s We are perfectly fine… a short review”
« Life is about people »
Tim Shaw wrote this. He was in the NFL. Read what he learned from ALS, a progressive degenerative neurological disease… A powerful story about resilience and what gives life meaning. http://www.theplayerstribune.com/articles/tim-shaw-titans-letter-to-my-younger-self/amp
About inclusion…
Today, I would like you to take 3 minutes of your time and watch this powerful video. It says it all. Trust me; if you skip 3 minutes of Facebooking or TikToking to watch this, it will be worth your time. Inclusion is not about just welcoming a person with a different eye or hairContinue reading “About inclusion…”
On positive business practices…
There is a lot to learn from big companies embracing the “wellness mindset.” Watch this great 3 min video: Stamps.com promoting positive business. There is a lot of literature supporting the idea that happy employees make happy customers, which is good for the bottom line. When we care about human beings’ needs and treat peopleContinue reading “On positive business practices…”
On death and dying…and what it means to live well
To write and think about death and dying is not macabre… it is really to write and think about how one can appreciate life and the gift of time. It is to ponder on one’s personal choices to use this precious time given in this beautiful fragile existence. What do we want? Where do weContinue reading “On death and dying…and what it means to live well”
The subtle art of not giving a fuck – A book review
A different perspective on dealing with the inevitable shit that comes in life. Yeah, life is full of beautiful things and we should appreciate that. But life is also full of problems and we should be honest about that too. It is not about caring less, it is about caring for the right things. WeContinue reading “The subtle art of not giving a fuck – A book review”
As years flow by on the river of time…
I’m revisiting a moment, a sweet memory from my life with my son…his entry into kindergarten in 2014. This afternoon, I met Liam at the end of his last school day and we walked home together. We have a long walk home, it gives us time to talk and reflect. There is a hidden symbolismContinue reading “As years flow by on the river of time…”
The nigh rider…
The sun has gone down. The moon hides behind the clouds. The forest is quiet. Fireflies create a surreal atmosphere. A silent light quietly travels the forest. I recently fell in love with night riding. Alone with my bike, pedalling the night away, inspiring music in my ears, this solitude is comfortable. I am aContinue reading “The nigh rider…”
About job crafting and emotional intelligence
Govan Brown is an example of emotional intelligence and job crafting we should admire and strive to emulate. He was a bus driver. He loved his job, and the people he drove loved him so much for simple reasons. He was kind, considerate and he cared about people. Any job can be crafted to beContinue reading “About job crafting and emotional intelligence”
On self-care… again.
A great question that every middle-age man or woman should ask and find his or her own answer. When we spend our lives caring about other people, is it unreasonable to reserve a few hours every week to allow ourselves to… just have fun? Wandering in the forest of our area on my bike onContinue reading “On self-care… again.”
Martin Pham Dinh 